First Month.

We've been living in our new home for a month.  We are doing great, adjusting accordingly, and embracing this new season in our lives.  Here is a roundup of our first month... pictures do speak louder than my words.

 Brandon working alongside his dad.

Shiloh completing her chores.

Our amazing heater/wood stove.

 Sister reading to sister.

 The dandelions keep us entertained.

 Oh, and Capri does too.

Shiloh's potty chart.  We are hoping potty-training-round-6 is the final round.

Can one ever have too many chalkboards?

 Shiloh is my little bug-hunter.

 Cleaning up after the girls is endless.

 Its hard to decide where to hang things.

 Big chevron planter & little get brought inside on freezing nights.

Dirty work boots have replaced the usual flip-flops.

Shiloh painting.

 Her masterpieces.

 Our second front door is my favorite.

 Napping on Mommy & Daddy's floor.

 Ah, the clean laundry that stares at me until I fold & put it all away.

 Working on hanging & framing... I can't wait to have decorated walls.

 I love my ceramic urchin.

 I don't love my ever diminishing stock of my favorite Trader Joe's items.

And Capri LOVES her some sweet potatoes and beets.  Seriously, its her favorite.

Fear.

I have been meaning to write this post for a while now.  But I always hesitated.  I don't have much to say about it... due to the fact that I am in the midst of it.

I never really have been a fearful individual.  I have always been an either adventurous girl, or a cautious one, depending on the season of life... but not fearful... at least not how I have been experiencing fear lately.

When Shiloh was born and little I remember having a few anxious moments where fear gripped me.  Becoming a Mommy tested my faith.  It made me responsible for another delicate life, but I wasn't always able to control things that happened to her... I had to experience faith in new ways.

But when Capri was born, the anxiety and fear tripled.  Okay, maybe it doubled, then tripled, and then multiplied by 10... then lets be honest, then by 100.

I have a hard time putting it into words.  But I felt like I was holding a stack of balancing wine glasses that could topple over and spill at the slightest mistake and then crash to the ground and shatter.  But those wine glasses were my children.  I feared their safety. I feared their health.  I feared for their lives.

I am daily working through this fear thing.  Having to stop when it hits, take deep breaths, pray and praise Jesus, and then collect myself and move forward.  I haven't conquered it.  I don't know when I will.  But I know its growing me and testing me.  Its testing my faith and trust to relinquish control and place my children in God's hands.

"In you, Lord my God, I put my trust."

~Psalm 25:1

Not all those...

"Not all those who wander are lost. "

~J.R.R. Tolkien

Although they are seeing the world through very young eyes, I pray that my kids fall in love with the world, and look beyond themselves as they grow up.  I hope that they are inspired to go across the borders of America and bring love to other nations.